A Tale Of Unsolicited D*ck Pics

Don’t be like these guys.

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Photo by Dainis Graveris of Unsplash

Most women will agree that at some point in their life they have received a text, a catcall, an image, or a level of interaction that was sexual in nature and entirely unwarranted. (If you haven’t, just wait). Gone are the days (seemingly) where men assume a woman is drawn to intellect first and aesthetic second. It’s as if we have forgotten that the latter will fade, yet the former is forever. This society of instant gratification thrives on immediate responses and validation of our efforts, particularly in the world of intimacy. However, for a sapiosexual, this is the furthest assumption to be made from the truth.

“A sapiosexual is someone that is sexually and mentally turned on by smart people. Sapiosexuals are aroused by intelligence.”

We, as women, have kept our mouths shut for entirely too long and it’s about time someone broke open the seal of honest discussion and shed light on the reality of the situation. From Instagram and Facebook to Snapchat and Twitter, it seems each profile has its own hidden agenda among users. Regardless of the belief system a man holds, there is never an okay time to distribute pictures of your junk among a sea of females who didn’t ask for them. Below are a few examples from both my personal arsenal as well as friends of mine who have chosen to participate in this effort to elucidate the matter.

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This particular conversation was geared in a direction towards my lack of desire to be in a relationship and how the recent quarantine has impacted my social life — a result of his inquisitiveness in various aspects of my existence. When I shared my disinterest in men at this point in my life, he used this as an opportunity to challenge the notion and even felt an unsolicited d*ck pic might win me over and support his belief that, “I would really enjoy sex with him.” At least we know he's got a humorous side.

Oh, and should I mention this pic came in while I was in the midst of teaching a 6-year-old?

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Completely out of the blue, unwarranted, and via a message request from a complete stranger. The messages in the screenshot were over the course of several days and with firm adamance regarding a reply — which he never received.

I wish I were lying about the frequency of these occurrences, but the proof is in the pics. The boldness and tenacity that a woman will throw herself in the direction of a man with anatomically accurate body parts is absurd. Don’t be like any of these men.

Shall we continue?

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I suppose ‘hot’ is the new synonym for ‘easy’ in this context. Not a single message leading up to this unwarranted image and yet somehow, this guy thinks the mere image of his sucked in stomach and grasped male anatomy will lead me to join him beneath his black and white chevron bedding. Think again.

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No, no I don’t, actually. Thank you for spoiling my lunch though. A little background on this picture: In the middle of a Tuesday afternoon, while I am out to lunch with a former boss of mine, with zero conversation leading up to the picture.

This could easily be mistaken for an exaggeration, but I can assure you, it is hardly so. Women deserve the right to decide whether or not they want your male parts in their inbox.

Here’s a couple more for the road:

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For the love of all that is good, please do not use Porn acumen in your direct message to a female. Furthermore, do not follow it up with a picture of junk she never ordered. Trust me, if she’s interested and willing, you will know. In the meantime, how about leaving the package delivery up to Amazon.

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A little nauseous now, thanks.

In case the last guy’s spontaneous desire to engage in indecent exposure didn’t ruin my lunch, this one sure finished the job. Do not include a pet name in your very first message to a woman. Not only does it make you look juvenile, it also waives a bright red flag for the women who know where the conversation is headed. When you give a pet name to a woman before ever bothering to address her by name, it screams ‘cockiness’ (or in this case: just c*ck).

If you have yet to embark on a discussion of sexually explicit conversation with a female, assume it is in your best interest to follow her lead. In a world full of ‘he said-she said,’ the last thing you want to be is on trial because you sent a penis pic to someone you ‘thought wanted it’ or ‘believed was of age.’ Understand that if a woman wants to see what you are working with, most of us will not hesitate to ask and though you might be the kind of man who is accepting of a woman putting her body on display, it is in your best interest to wait for the conversation to formally take a turn down the road of sexting.

Written by

Writer. Poet. Philomath. Dog Mom. Traveler. Creator. Wanderer. Teacher. Empath. Author of “Unapologetically Human” - available on Amazon

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